They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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