I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
