that's an acceptable place to lick
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
