I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
