This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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