I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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