i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
