But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
