Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
