i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
