garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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