dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
