I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Oh god it's open bar.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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