69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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