guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
