why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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