i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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