I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
