why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
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