hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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