did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
