you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
