why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
