He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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