I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
