I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
