she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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