Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
