I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
