I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
