I wish you could order shots online.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
