Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
