I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
