well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
