I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I licked your asshole in confidence.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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