my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
