sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Holy sore nipples Batman
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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