i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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