We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
