He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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