I love black thongs
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
