Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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