Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
