they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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