I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
