His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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