Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
