Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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