Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
no you cant smoke seaweed
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
