I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
