I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
