Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
just tell him i said nine months
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize
